Finding Your Why
Why You Need a Strong "Why" Before Starting Triathlon Training
The Question That Changes Everything
Before you sign up for your first triathlon, Half Ironman, or any endurance challenge, there's one question you need to answer honestly…
Why?
Not "why not?" or "because it sounds like a good idea" or "my mate's doing it." But a real, deep down, brutally honest answer to why you're willing to get up at 5am in the freezing cold, sacrifice your social life, and put your body through months of gruelling training.
Because without a solid why - a reason that actually matters to YOU - you won't make it through the hard bits. And trust me, there will be plenty of hard bits.
When "Because It's There" Isn't Enough
When I signed up for my first Half Ironman at 51, people asked me why. I gave them vague answers about fitness goals and trying something new. But that wasn't the truth.
The truth was much rawer. I was drowning. I felt invisible, irrelevant, like my best years were behind me. I needed to prove to myself that I was still capable of growth, still capable of surprising myself, still capable of being more than "just a mum" or "that middle-aged woman nobody notices."
That was my why. It wasn't pretty or Instagram worthy, but it was real. And it was strong enough to get me out of bed on those dark mornings when every sensible part of my brain was screaming to stay under the duvet.
If your why is superficial - losing a bit of weight, impressing people, ticking something off a bucket list - it won't be enough when training gets tough. And training WILL get tough.
Nobody Else Really Cares (And That's Okay)
Here's a harsh truth that nobody tells you. Apart from maybe your immediate family, nobody else really cares that you're training for a triathlon.
Your colleagues will politely nod when you mention your weekend long ride, then immediately change the subject. Your friends will stop asking about training because they don't understand why anyone would voluntarily put themselves through this. Your social media posts about early morning pool sessions will get fewer likes than photos of your cat.
This isn't because people are unsupportive or mean. It's because unless they've done it themselves, they genuinely cannot relate to what you're going through. They don't understand the commitment, the sacrifice, the mental strength it requires. To them, it's just "going for a swim" or "a bike ride" - things that don't seem worth organising your entire life around.
And you know what? That's absolutely fine. Because you're not doing this for them.
This Has to Be For You
Your why has to be entirely, completely, selfishly for YOU. Not for your partner, not for your kids, not to impress anyone or prove anything to anyone else.
For you.
Because on those mornings when it's dark, cold, and raining, and you're supposed to be doing a two-hour bike ride, nobody else is going to drag you out of bed. Your family might even actively encourage you to stay home where it's warm and comfortable.
The only thing that will get you on that bike is YOUR reason. YOUR why. YOUR need to do this thing that seems mental to everyone else but essential to you.
What Makes a Strong Why
A strong why usually involves one or more of these elements:
Proving something to yourself - Not to others, to yourself. That you're capable of more than you thought. That age doesn't define your limits. That you can set a terrifying goal and actually achieve it.
Escaping a version of yourself you don't want to be - Invisible, stuck, settling, fading into the background. Sometimes we're not running towards something as much as running away from who we'll become if we don't change.
Reclaiming something you've lost - Your identity beyond your roles. Your sense of purpose. Your belief in your own capability. The version of yourself who takes up space and matters.
Survival - Sometimes training isn't about thriving, it's about surviving. About giving yourself something to focus on when everything else feels overwhelming. About proving you're still here, still fighting, still capable of growth.
None of these whys are cheerful or Instagram worthy. They're messy, complicated, and deeply personal. That's what makes them strong enough to sustain you through months of training.
When Your Why Gets Tested
Your why will be tested. Repeatedly. Often at 5:30am when your alarm goes off and every cell in your body wants to stay in bed.
It'll be tested when you're exhausted, when training feels impossible, when you question whether you've completely lost the plot. When your friends are out for brunch and you're doing hill repeats. When your family asks if you're "still doing all that training stuff."
These are the moments when a weak why crumbles. "I thought it would be fun" doesn't get you through the pool session where you can't breathe properly. "Everyone else is doing it" doesn't sustain you through the bike ride from hell.
But a strong why? A deep, personal, brutally honest reason that touches something essential about who you are and who you want to become? That will carry you through anything.
My Why Evolved
My initial why - proving I wasn't invisible and past it - got me through my first Half Ironman. But by the time I was training for the full Ironman, my why had evolved.
It became about showing my kids what's possible when you refuse to accept limitations. About proving that transformation doesn't have an age limit. About becoming someone who keeps promises to herself, even when those promises are hard.
Your why can evolve too. It doesn't have to stay the same throughout your entire journey. But you always need to have one. Always need to know, deep down, what you're actually doing this for.
Finding Your Why
So before you sign up for that race, ask yourself honestly:
Why do I want to do this?
Not why you think you should want to do it. Not why it would look good on social media. Not why other people are doing it.
Why do YOU need this challenge?
What will achieving it prove to you about yourself? What are you running towards (or away from)? What version of yourself are you trying to become? What will this give you that you desperately need right now?
Sit with those questions. Get uncomfortable with them. Find the real answer, not the polite one you'd give at a dinner party.
The Uncomfortable Truth
The uncomfortable truth is that endurance training is hard, time-consuming, occasionally miserable, and requires sacrifice. Without a compelling personal reason - a why that's strong enough to override every excuse your brain will generate - you won't make it through. Ultimately what kept me going was knowing that if I wanted to succeed I had to go all in. If I missed a training session for any reason other than illness or injury, I knew that mentally I wouldn’t feel prepared.
But with the right why? With a reason that touches something essential about who you are and who you're becoming? You'll be unstoppable.
Not because training becomes easy (it doesn't). Not because motivation is constant (it isn't). But because your why is bigger than your excuses, stronger than your doubts, and more important than your comfort.
Your Why Is Waiting
What's your why? What's the real reason you're considering this mad challenge?
Find it. Own it. Let it be messy and complicated and deeply personal.
Then use it. Every single morning. Every hard session. Every moment you want to quit.
Your why is your superpower. It's what transforms "I can't" into "I will." It's what carries you from signing up terrified to crossing the finish line triumphant.
You don't need a perfect why. You just need one that's true.